unveiled

the first version of my blog was written while i was going through multiple separations from my ex-husband, multiple getting back togethers and finally, a divorce. i slowed down on my writing because it started to feel redundant and it wasn't helping me much. it was me trying to figure out what i was supposed to do and just sort of process everything because writing helps me.

 i don't seek clarity now, but i do feel like i haven't been a true version of myself for very long. i think the real me has surprised people who have known me and they aren't sure why. not being yourself is a slow and painful way to live; a way i wouldn't recommend to anyone. i was a version of me that i thought others would find more acceptable. i edited out certain parts of me, kept things to myself and pushed through life in a way that wasn't satisfying to me.

for too long, i've sat quiet. never wanting to offend anyone, but always having more to say. i wasn't sure i would be offensive, but i listened to the advice. don't say too much. people don't really want to know. some things don't need to be shared. i always wondered how "they" knew what i was going to say, how they were sure it would be offensive or be "too much."

this second edition of my blog is renamed and properly so. it's about ME. i think most moms end up being so and so's mom...I want to be known as more than just someone's mom, even though i know there is nothing greater than being a mom.

sometimes i'll write, sometimes i'll share the things i love or things that make me feel happy or good or places i want to go. sometimes it'll be a song i have come across that i love. i just want people to know the real me. the things i've been through and the things i'm going through now. hopefully it'll help someone somewhere.

i have a variety of interests and things i love that i'll probably share now and then, namely soft clothes, jeans, natural living, healthy food and gardening. i practice yoga. i like music, but couldn't tell you which bands/groups/artists (mostly because i'm terrible with details). i read, garden, love writing. i love my people. i struggle with anxiety, but i've started a medication and so far, so good. i think i could worry about things a little more sometimes, but what good does worrying even do? i'm terrible with time and dates and knowing for sure what day it is. (i'm working on it!)

the best thing i am doing right now in this very moment is loving myself. well, learning to. i've been told for too long i'm too much of everything. i'm learning to let go, move forward and be my best self. to do all of this, i have learned to have personal courage and to own all of the things that make me who i am.